Growing pains, going on pains part of life
By Elaine Wheat
"The time is now past." - Matthew 14:15
Today on this Mother's Day weekend, I discovered that it is very hard to return to places where we once were.
I finally returned to the last place where my Mom and I fished together. Life looks differently through the rear view mirror.
I have returned to a lot of places where we used to fish, but I have not been able to go back to the last place, and the best place, we fished.
Returning stirs up memories that have long lain dormant, but never dead.
The road to The Place was as familiar as a lost lover's laugh, giving me feelings of belonging to yesterday. The familiarity was shattered when I crossed through the sand dunes and found a condominium on the canal that was once our hidden fishing cove.
The sand had turned to cement, the wild salt grass to trimmed hedges and tennis courts and the dunes to high-rise glass and brick dwellings that one could hide within instead of behind.
The only things that were the same were the sky and sea, the things that were beyond the touch of progressive, possessive hands.
In memory of my mom, I tried to fish there, but the cement on the bulkhead burned my feet causing them to want to run away and seek the sea soaked sand.
A wave must have hit me in the face, for salt-tasting tears soaked my face until I could see nowhere but inward.
Finally a tidal wave of emotions washed over me leaving me soaked with the feeling of helplessness one always feels while grabbing for the past in a vain attempt to hang on or recover that which has been washed away by time.
I had to get out of there. I went to a place that I had never tried to fish before, a new beginning. As luck would have it, I landed the biggest flounder I have ever caught. I held it Heavenward and shouted, "Look, Mom, what we caught today!"
Dear Lord, thank you for helping me understand that growing pains and going on pains are part of Your loving plans for life.
Oceans for Emotions Volume 3 is available at the Advocate office for $10. It's a great Mothers Day gift, for the woman who loves fishing, or loves someone who loves fishing. To order a copy, call 361-575-1451.