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Oceans for Emotions: Fish tales won't work with God

Elaine Wheat
  • Originally published May 27, 2011 at midnight, updated May 27, 2011 at midnight

By Elaine Wheat

"I said in my haste, 'All men are liars.'"

- Psalms 116:11

Today, I asked two fisher friends how they did on their last fishing trip. They smiled, winked, nodded and replied, "It sure takes a long time to clean two limits of redfish and trout." I was envious until they honestly continued, "Especially if they are still swimming in the ocean." I started to nominate them for president.

Later today, as I was sitting by the sea, also stringerless, I thought of all of the ways I could answer that prying question of, "Catch anything?" without using the word, "Nope."

Here are some of my plausible denials:

"I'll tell you this, there is one less limit of fish out there for you. Surely someone caught them, somewhere."

"We'll have a fish fry. You bring the potatoes."

"There's limits and there's limits, chuckle, chuckle."

"If I hadn't caught fish, would I be going home now?"

"The one that got away, didn't today."

"Show me your game warden badge, and I'll show you my ice chest."

"Just got here."

"Reel's fouled up."

"Tide's fixing to change."

"Lost several."

All of these excuses will always be better than just, "Nope."

"Why do people even ask questions to fishermen or presidents?"

Dear Lord, You are the only one we can't ever lie to because You know us too well. Whoa, that's scary.