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Rushing Runaway
By askalice in Ask Alice
August 5, 2011

Dear Readers: Sometimes we get frustrated with our parents or people close to us and feel as if we aren't wanted or cared for, so much so that we want to run away. We think that life would just be easier if we were left on our own. But that's not always true. Think about life like a big knitted blanket, with all the seams and threads in place; if you run away from your problems, then it's as if you took scissors and ripped the blanket up the middle. Now there's all these frayed and splitting ends that can't be fixed up again and you are always left wondering what it would be like if the blanket was finished. Running away from problems only makes them worse because they just become those frayed blanket ends that are unable to be mended. You might wonder "what if I had stayed to fix them?" and end up regretting your decision to leave and feel worse than you did before. So running away really doesn't help anything, especially at this age because you might not be able to finish high school, go to college, or get a job and support yourself. Just remember that all teenagers, you, me, and your friends, go through the same feelings and it's okay to talk to someone about your emotions. Lots of Love, Alice

Original Ask Alice:

Dear Alice: All I want to do is run away from all my problems. Most of the time I feel trapped and angry, and that no one wants me around. I've made some really bad decisions that I can’t change back, and a lot of my friends have turned away from me because of them. On some of the decisions I haven’t told the whole truth about, and it’s eating me up inside because I know that the person involved with the lie is being hurt. Wouldn't it be better if I just ran away from home and away from all this? -Escape Artist

Dear Escape Artist: NO! Running away from your problems will never work. Think of life like a patchwork quilt, it all meshes to form one big picture. But if you stop in the middle of making the quilt, everything unravels and the quilt is left unfinished. The same happens if you run away and leave all of these loose ends. Everyone makes bad decisions, and the best part about them is that normally you can fill them back in with good ones. Start by telling whatever truth you’re holding back. Especially tell the person you mentioned in the letter the truth, because with truth comes understanding and healing and you can save them from further pain. Maybe some of the friends you lost will see the new, honest you and come back to the friend from before the bad decisions. Also, talk to an adult counselor about your anger. Remember that you've already taken the first step by asking for help from me. Sometimes things are really tough, but it’s a mark of our character when we can ask for help to make things good again. -Lots of Love, Alice