Cat- I don't know if i'd rather hit you or hug you but I know this...you seem honest and helpful and I like that. Please know, I'm going to take your advice and apply it to the best of my ability. I won't promise to change my "style" of writing, that's who I am and I believe in what I write, but I will work on appling your other suggestions and see if they don't make a difference.
Again, thanks for taking the time to give me some great advice. I can see where your hearts at and I know you mean well. thank you.

???? There is not a larger font in the blog that I can see, I liked the blog.

Ringer expressed a opinion, articulated it well (IMO) and even used a touch of humor.

It is ashame that you choose to unclearly choose a subject of which you have no long term experience and are making assumptions about. When you say the majority of people --you are including my mom and her husband too and I really resent that. Their life is like mine. So is my husband's three brothers and his three sister's. Maybe one needs to really think carefully before jumping into a relationship as to what the commitment is going to require.

If you intended to help people, as a budding writer, do your backgroud research. As I said originally, you started off beautifully and then it seemed you became a very angry young woman. And I have no clue to your age. You have a gift, people are reading you. Use that gift to the fullest extent. I know I fail to remove my emotions many times --I have been bit and am trying to be calmer.

One secret is to write an article in word. Let it cool a day or two. Then go back and see if you said what you really want to to your audience. You appear to be a social writer, that can go very far. I read one yesterday on a subject of racism that was done better than I have seen in years. I want to contact her to see if she will submit as feature to VicAd since we throw the term so loosly. If not maybe I can refer to her. You will be that style of writer. I will look up name and pass on. You do have strengths. It is just the voice. Even it it appears that a co-worker chose it as a blog of the week.

And I know that those will come to the defense of Ringer...but everyone has a perspective on an article and she really turned my head the wrong way on this one. Totally.

John- you always have something to say that makes me smile- thanks buddy:)

I'm LUVVVVVVVVVVVn ur "TUDE"!

I find you interesting Ringer. While, many others have peaked my interest, I have applied that statement to none.

I hope to see more of your commentary; I think it has value beyond even your intentions. The reactions you get from others alone on this posting, have intrigued me further than most. It is really fun.

Different people are going to preceive different things, even among writers. There is no one set way, and there will never be; regardless of how hard others try to make it so. Human beings can not be forced to think and interpret the same way over long stretches of time.

Have a nice day.

I do not write from a personal perspective. As a matter of fact- I write because it challenges "me" to think differently than what I've been "raised to believe" or is happening in my own life. "I" enjoy writing opposite the majority's viewpoint, simply because it shows another perspective, one most, never consider.

My intent to post here is to leave a message to help others. I do not have a degree in communications of any kind. And, most of the time, I write about "subjects" that entertain "me"!

Before you take a minute to critize others Catahula- "we all have differnt opinions and beliefs and had you read another of my blogs before reading this one- you would better understand my style of writing and know in your heart I am not here to be critical of others..." I do appreciate your "input" and hope you'll continue to keep reading from this blog.

A lot of this depends on the certain household's situation. Do both work, what type of jobs, does one work many hours and days and harder work more than the other, etc.

Shared around the house work. Yes, if the situation fits.

Your situation, you are correct.

Ringer, sorry I do not know your personal style. I just know from my background in business and technical communications, which did include journalistic training that one, has to be careful about the use of all caps. When using ensure your reader knows it can mean joy, exuberance, etc. Or it comes across as anger or a rant.

In business we warned all employees to be careful and never use because receivers tend to believe it is anger. Thus my feelings. Throughout the entire article I was wondering who pushed your button and made you angry enough to write the article -- not thinking as a recipient that you were offering friendly advice. Sorry that was how I caught it based on personal experience.

And yes, a relationship can be and is a hard thing to manage. If you have someone trying to help, then for Pete's sake don't criticize and nag. (I have heard too many of my co-workers over the years go on and on every day to the point I bluntly asked why don't you divorce him if you are that miserable.)

I made the personal promise to never say anything bad about my significant other then hubby in public. And you know what, it kept me from looking for the little bad habits.

I think with your bold words I can say this. It is just as easy to find something nice than bad. If all you can find to say is bad. Maybe it is time to do a personal ledger accounting and figure out is you or him. You may be the real bad hag not him---maybe he is fighting that hag. Or if it is him.... If it is not too late, why are you together --did you do your homework up front in your relationship? Did you go for looks not the person? You may have no room for complaints. Just clean up your act and accept it or leave before you devolve to hate, spite, or physical violence.

And guys, take this last paragraph and apply it to yourself. Sometimes it is easy to criticize about what is not getting done at home or why she can't loose 10 pounds without knowing all the facts. (Heck my inability to not loose weight led to me finding out about a rare liver disorder). However if something is really bad. If there is fighting all the time. You need to take an accounting too. Is it really her or is it really you?

Maybe a little counseling or coaching is what both need. Breathe. Stop and hug. Take a bath and smell each other's feet--look at life from another point of view.

On another note... I end all my post with a "LARGE" font message, one I feel is important. It's just my style of writing and not meant to be any type of rant!

...catahula, you have written from another perspective that I can't argue with. I respect your imput and admire anyone who has been married thirty years so I'll leave it at that.

No ringer what you thought you wrote about you did not finish sorry it started out great --you lost me in the middle. You are suppose to be the communicator and you lost it. Sorry puppy. You started out very calm and ended in a larger font that comes across as a rant. So sweetie you seem to be doing what you say not to do....

As for me and hubbie --we have been together for over 30 years and shared tasks and responsibilities around the home. We switch when necessary and as life has dictated, depending on his career or mine. We have never once fought over who should do or who is accountable.

In fact he has done more since he was self employed and I worked the long career hours. When I became quite ill, he was the one who picked up my slack when I almost died. I thanked God I had him.

You never take that kind of partner for granted. You think of little things to do to surprise him --from special meals, books, massages, pictures, poems, etc. You must not forget to tell him even after thirty years that he looks great. You like his bum (I really do)and his feet are truely sexy.

I have lived with a mere male that was cruel and did nothing. I now live with a real man that loves to stand by me in the kitchen and create a meal giggling and experimenting. We take turns on clean up. Always have since I met him. We take turns on everything. Except cooking rice --he does that better than me.

So Ringer even though your blog is very disjointed -- you were the one raising your voice with the larger fonts. That is why you can loose a reader. And thus it was something of value to say even though you as a writer did not want to hear it.

I finally got hubby to undertake some house work & he does a great job, which I point out often! He even does my laundry & hangs all my shirts to dry (the dryer "shrinks" my clothes). I take care of finances & such, I cook, he cleans kitchen....it works out great!

LoL!

The necessities, for a particular "quality of life", determine responsibilities. Failure to meet these responsibilities adequately, results in diminished quality of life.

Who does what, changes from human to human; and social structure to social structure, but one thing remains the same. Sane people will either preform essential task, or influence someone too. Insane people will accept diminished quality of life; either because their survival instinct is not triggered or does not exist adequately to initiate a proper response.

I like this posting, its fun.

Have a nice sane day everybody!

I've been watching simpsons too much, that quack doctor cracks me up with his "Hi everybody".

As a man, I think you are exactly right Ringer.

I heard it left and right one time when I did the laundry washing, yes I separated and washed in the right temperature, the problem was the broom stick skirt.

"You dried IT!!!!!!!!!,Please just don't do my laundry again" My response?

What's the big deal? She started to explain, I promptly retrieved the skirt, soaked it in water, wringed it and twisted it up.

Well guess what? The next day when it dried it was absolutely as good it would have been anyway......... and all I got in return was a HMMMPH, no it worked, no thank you, no nothing.

And no admitting that I did not ruin the broomstick skirt. :P (the tongue sticking icon) LOL

OMG the scrutiny around this place. Isin't it ironic... just what I wrote about and explained concerning men and women- your guilty of cat...

even so- I appriciate your opinion!

I am not sure of your intent. You had a thought line going but it seemed to play out. It seems you left a cohesive bridge out--by doing so this article has less impact.