Blogs » Learning in Freedom » Eau de Love (a ramble)


This morning while gathering all the empty cups from around the house and straightening up all the messes that were made after I fell sleep I heard a little voice from down the hall moan, “Mooooooom. Mooooom, come and lay down with me.”

I put the dishes by the sink and crawled into my seven year old’s bed to cuddle with him. I love cuddling with babies in the morning. My seven year old is a baby. Yes. Yes, he is.

I know that Dr. Spock and Gary Ezzo would frown on me but our children always slept in our bed until the next baby came along. It took our last child seven years to sleep in his own room and it didn’t happen until we moved into this house...has it been a month or two?

I remember some of my “perfect parent” friends teasing me about how lazy I was and I would always say, “Well, I guarantee you that by the time he is a teen he will be sleeping in his own bed!” I had that same comeback for my laissez-faire (take that, spell check!) attitude towards potty training, puggy sucking, thumb sucking, WEANING, and even learning to read. "I don't care if he learns to read early, just so he is reading by the time he goes to college." "Well, he won't be nursing when he goes off to college!" I was always pleasantly surprised and greatly relieved that most of these milestones or habits were usually accomplished or abandoned naturally and right on time. I didn’t have to whip out my defensive comments for very long.

I was a totally different parent with my first child than I was with my last. So different that if mommy of #1 were to meet mommy #2 on the street they would get in a fist fight and both end up in jail. With the first baby we tried to do everything by the book. Hubby or I woke up every few hours to feed always-hungry-baby or rock never-tired-baby back to sleep. We even tried that technique where you let them cry for 10 minutes before you go into the room to pick them up. This was to condition them to not be too attached to being comforted by another human. Let them learn to self medicate? All of this adherence to the advise of parenting “experts” was quickly abandoned when I discovered that if I would just lie down on my side and put baby beside me with baby’s little head resting on my shoulder we could all sleep all through the night!

I guess we practiced “attachment parenting” before the phrase was coined or before Al Gore invented the internet. Once I got internet I found that all these weird things I was doing actually had cool names or even support groups.

Anyway, back to my seven year old baby who is finally sleeping in his own bed. He hugged me and covered my face with kisses and I kissed the top of his head and inhaled. I loved to smell the tops of all my babies heads. It is a strange act and it reminds me of a dog with a puppy but I honestly and truly love the scent of my babies. Yes, my seven year old is my baby and I still love to smell the top of his head. Does anyone else do that? Not smell My children, of course... But, your own.

Am I a freak? Wonder what the term is for that and if there is a support group for freaky head sniffing parents like me.

It’s the scent o’ love.

(Anyway, I call this a "ramble" because I wanted to play on the computer and I didn't want to edit so if you see typos, grammatical and punctuational errors you are just to write it off as, "Oh, she was typing really fast and didn't care to check or edit anything. Because she was rambling...")