The joys of being a parent to an infant are endless. The cooing and the smiles are to die for but the poopy diapers and three a.m. feedings, not so much. I have found that since being a first time mom at 19 years old and now a third time mom at 29 years old, my way of thinking on certain baby fad’s hasn’t changed, but I have.
I always wanted to be THAT amazing mom. You know, the one that uses the cloth diapers, puree’s her own organic baby food, breastfeeds way past her child’s 1st birthday, always has her kids and herself dressed adorably and all those wonderful things. When I say ‘always’ I mean when I was 19 years old and had my son, 23 years old and had my first daughter and again with the birth of my baby. The difference is that at 19 and 23 I didn’t have time, money, patience and frankly I was lazy. I wanted to do these awesome things but I didn’t want to put in the extra work to make it happen. I was too busy working a day job and taking a college class here and there. And that sucks, because now I am doing all (well, almost all) these things with my baby and I feel guilty. My older two had plain old Gerber baby food from the jar, formula for 85 percent of their first year and yea, I should have purchased stock in Huggies.
Being 29 years old and having my third little doodle bug, I feel like a different person than I was 10 years ago. And I am. At 19 (insert eye roll) I had no business being a parent. I didn’t have my crap together, I was selfish, I was immature and I didn’t know how to co-parent with my son’s best interest in the forefront. I was just trying to survive. And that didn’t benefit my son or myself.
Looking back, when I stopped just trying to survive and start building a future- setting goals and making them happen to provide a better life for my kids, I started to slowly become THAT mom, the mom I always wanted to be. My kids started having packed lunches (until they wanted to try the cafeteria food and then re-request packed lunches), I chaperon every school field trip, I go to every one of their school assemblies and class parties, I do their homework with them- except math, my son tells me all about his favorite books and my older daughter loves to read to her baby sissy and me.
And as for my baby, I am currently researching the best product to puree fruits and veggies, my husband and I purchased a freezer to store frozen breast milk and I only use natural and organic soaps and lotions on my little baby’s soft skin. Her poops are way too violent for me to attempt cloth diapers but I have done my research and may attempt them- if I can get my gag reflex under control.
It is amazing to look back and see how much my character has changed. I do my due diligence and research everything about everything when it comes to my children, whether it be sports related, public school verses switching to private schools and everything baby related. I also find myself having more patience when it comes to disciplining, elementary school work and 3 a.m. feedings. Yet, I am much more protective and try to shield my children from a lot more things.
It takes a lot of work and time to be THAT mom!! I look back and wonder how the hell I made things work as a former single mom?! And that makes me so appreciative, and know that I do have to give credit to my husband. My husband provides a wonderful life for our family that allows me to be able to stay at home, attend UHV full time and be THE mom I have always envisioned myself to be.
Oh, and to date my kids are always dressed super cute while I, on the other hand look like the housemaid!
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