It's a question that has kept many of us up at night. When the Rapture finally comes, what, oh what, is a person to do about their beloved pets who are left behind on earth?
Well, never fear. There is a company that is already all over this, folks.
Now, I'm not sure if this is a massive joke, a massive hoax or a legit deal, but all I know is that it's so awful and so awesome, the only way to describe it is awfsome.
A company called Eternal Earthbound Pets, USA is made of up of a group of animal-loving atheists who, for a small fee, will take care of your beloved Fido and Mr. Fluffy Poo once you are taken up to heaven during the Rapture.
I know. I told you.
On their Web site it says, and I quote, "Our network of animal activists are committed to step in when you step up to Jesus."
The company is active in 20 states so far, alas Texas is not one of them.
Their service plan is simple enough: "For $110.00 we will guarantee that should the Rapture occur within ten (10) years of receipt of payment, one pet per residence will be saved. Each additional pet at your residence will be saved for an additional $15.00 fee. A small price to pay for your peace of mind and the health and safety of your four legged friends."
They even have a FAQ page, with answers to your most burning questions such as "Is this a joke?" (No) and "How do you ensure your representatives won't be Raptured?" (They have given us their word they are atheist in writing).
Wow. I mean, I'd make another joke or inappropriate comment here, but I really don't think I have to.
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10 Comments
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Comments
My question is: How many have already forked over their cash?
August 22, 2009 at 4:07 a.m.After the post and comments, I too was giggling!!
August 18, 2009 at 1:47 p.m.Well, my free time at work is relative to the phrase "getting caught mindlessly surfing the Web."
August 18, 2009 at 1:12 p.m.How did you find out about this Aprill? Are they giving you free time at work again?
August 18, 2009 at 1:08 p.m.There is always someone around ready to take your money.
August 18, 2009 at 12:20 p.m.It's always good to be prepared.
August 18, 2009 at 12:12 p.m.Roy, I'm not too worried about my dog Buffy. I know he's going to hell, probably in a handbasket. He's an anarchist. And I suspect a communist.
August 18, 2009 at 10:44 a.m.LoL!
There are so many things I could say about this that are both funny and disturbing, so I won't.
I must say, that this posting did make me chuckle a bit; that in itself makes it great.
August 18, 2009 at 10:40 a.m.Everyone knows that it would not be heaven w/out our pets. SO I think our pet will go with us if we make it. Otherwise the poor dang thing will just end up in hell w/the rest of us. Probably be biting us for eternity
August 18, 2009 at 10:26 a.m.There's also a post-rapture delivery service.
August 18, 2009 at 10:24 a.m.