Blogs » Pop Goes the Culture » The world is ending...(sigh)...again

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Well, folks, according to a random news release I just received, if we manage to survive 2012, it won't really matter since we'll all die in 2013 (although at least it gives us another few months to indulge in panicky hedonistic behavior, eh?).

Yes, some dude named Dr. William Forstchen has written a bestselling book called "One Second After" in which, you guessed it, we all die. According to the news release, the book "details the horrific aftermath of an electromagnetic pulse (EMP) attack on the United States – although a novel, his education on the subject has now caught some serious attention of military commanders and lawmakers in Washington."

Supposedly experts are predicting a potentially catastrophic peak of geomagnetic activity in May of 2013.

As such, this EMP blast, whether from nuclear bombs or solar activity, could destroy our entire electronic, transportation and communications infrastructure in less than one second (Dun Dun DUNNN!). If that happens, within a year, 90 percent of all Americans could be dead (DUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNN!).

Personally, I'm holding out for a 2012 scenario in which John Cusack in all his High Fidelity neurosis glory comes to my rescue. In the meantime, I'm planning on making some extra bucks by selling Team 2012 and Team 2013 T-shirts.

Only $29.99 each, my friends. You want to look good for doomsday, don't you? Make your loyalty known before you are instantly and horrifically killed! (Limited time only, void where prohibited).