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  • kellirhea

    Oh, goody gumdrops

    By kellirhea in Quixotic Quicksand

    I'm greatly anticipating Gwen Stefani's guest appearance on American Idol tonight. It's just what our ears need: someone who can't sing teaching other people who can't sing to, well, not sing.

  • kellirhea

    Confucius says

    By kellirhea in Quixotic Quicksand

    While in a supermarket recently, I saw a tabloid magazine cover (OK! Magazine, I think) featuring juxtaposed photos of Britney Spears and Pamela Anderson. The headline said something about Pamela giving advice to Britney. Yeah. That's exactly what Britney needs. ...

  • kellirhea

    American I-Dull: The briefest recap ever

    By kellirhea in Quixotic Quicksand

    This week's American Idol leaves me, as is the norm these days, uninspired. And since I'm short on time today, I'm going to sum up each of the 11 remaining finalists' performances in one word, and one word only. Here ...

  • kellirhea

    I just want to know...

    By kellirhea in Quixotic Quicksand

    ...exactly how much airbrushing went into this photo, which is currently being displayed on Britney Spears' offical Web site. Who are they trying to kid? Even I am not that svelte at my paltry 115 pounds, and we know Britney ...

  • kellirhea

    <center>Hair.</center>

    By kellirhea in Quixotic Quicksand

    It's the hair. It's got to be the hair. And no, I'm not talking about the musical. I'm talking about the magical mystery of Sanjaya Malakar's plausible appeal among American Idol viewers... Ladies, quit voting for this boy's hair! Close ...

  • kellirhea

    American I-Dull

    By kellirhea in Quixotic Quicksand

    Is it just me or is American Idol 6.0 a snoozefest? Last night’s show was, in a word, prosaic. My thoughts on our amazingly bland top 12 finalists… Melissa Doolittle: Yes, she can sing. Yes, her “little ole me?” attitude ...

  • kellirhea

    The Scuttlebutt Shuffle

    By kellirhea in Quixotic Quicksand

    As you can see from dearth of recent posts, I've been lacking material with which to entertain you. As it turns out, this problem stems from my expenditure of what little intellect I have on my studies and my job. ...

  • kellirhea

    Improper hygiene: Putting the 'ick' in "sick"

    By kellirhea in Quixotic Quicksand

    People, people, people! It is NOT enough to simply run your hands under the faucet for 2.5 seconds after using the restroom. You MUST use soap and make a serious effort not to gross out your coworkers. And you wonder ...

  • kellirhea

    Boo!

    By kellirhea in Quixotic Quicksand

    Maybe this photo is actually good for something—I'm hoping it'll at least scare away all the comment spammers.

  • kellirhea

    Spenserian sonnet: Anami

    By kellirhea in Quixotic Quicksand

    If you're wondering where I've been, I've posted the fruits of my graduate school labor below. It's proof that I have not been slacking but perfecting my poetry skills. This sonnet is a work in progress and recounts my feelings ...

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