Don't turn your back to the gorilla
May 29, 1879: Iowa State University opens the first veterinary school in the United States. Limited in funds for the first term, the students only had three animals to practice on: A pig with acne and ennui; a cow with ...

Peace, love and dames
May 22, 1200: The Peace of Goulet is signed. Exhausted after years of fighting and terrorizing the countryside, Robert celebrates with whiskey sours and dames

Emperor Brat
May 21, 996: Otto III is crowned Rome's emperor. The 16-year-old locked himself in his room for the next four years, coming out only for meals. Otto wrote only four decrees during his reign: I Don't Know; I Don't Care; ...

Beethoven's Black Funk
April 27, 1810: Beethoven composes "Fur Elise." While working on his piano masterpiece, someone yells "Freebird" from outside the window, sending the composer into a black funk, from which he would never emerge. To see more Uncle History, CLICK HERE

Curses! Foiled forever!
April 21, 1917: The Red Baron is killed by a dog.

Take me out of the ball game!!
April 17, 1869: First professional baseball game begins. April 17, 1872: First professional baseball game ends.

PSSSTT!!! Wanna see my dysentery?
April 4, 1581: Francis Drake completes his circumnavigation of the globe to much fanfare. It wasn't long, however, before people started to avoid the explorer after he began insisting on showing anyone his dysentery collection.

In which the cater gets parsed
On this day in sports history April 5, 1932: Walter "Wobbly" Williams wins the English men's Guhulong trials. In an exciting finish, Williams scores a record-breaking 5 double prots to go ahead of "Pungent" Pete Patterson by 3 tickerts. Patterson ...

We gave them the vote, isn't that enough?
March 29, 1955: Dr. Greg " Grunter" McQuickly, president of the American Medical Association, dismisses the notion of the female orgasm as a "falsehood." "I've been married to Mrs. McQuickly for 32 years now," the doctor explained, "and I've never ...

Go, Chim Chim, Go!!!
March 27, 1969: A teenage driver, with a strangely appropriate name, wins the Monaco Grand Prix, despite several attempts on his life by an evil Jackie Stewart. The young champion would have died had it not been for a weird ...