Blogs » The Daily Dose » Should I name my first born Blog Entry Ortega?


I really hope you didn't say yes ... PLEASE tell me you didn't say YES.

It's hard to avoid the reality of some of the names being given to children this generation. Never has it been more clear than in the Hollywood circle.

The latest - Bristol Palin's "baby daddy" Levi Johnston is planning to wed his 20-year-old pregnant bride-to-be (let's see if he'll keep his word). She too, is pregnant, (like Bristol was) and the name has been chosen and is set in stone.

The name they plan on: Breeze Beretta Johnston. He was inspired by a gun. That should go well, after all, his son's name is Tripp.

But, really? I mean REALLY? It's not only Hollywood circles though. I've known people who have named their kids something WAY out there, like Abcde or Skyy Blue. (I'm not joking).

While I respect those people, I always think they weren't really considering the baby's well-being. This will be his/her identity. I think parents today are often trying to push the envelope and come up with the wackiest name just so they can get some recognition.

So here's my list - my hat goes off to my these five Hollywood stars for picking some of the worst names ever. If it weren't for their loads of money and stardom, these poor kids would probably be teased endlessly. (Eh, let's face it, America will always judge their parents for these crazy names).

Drumroll, please.

  1. Name: Moxie Crimefighter
    Penn Jillette - I have no problem with the name Moxie, but crimefighter? I hope for your sake that she grows up to kick some major villain butt.

  2. Name: Tu Morrow
    Rob Morrow - Tu-morrow! Tu-morrow! I'll lova ya, Tu-morrow ... eh, no we won't Rob Morrow. Really? You're very creative. I can't wait to hear news of Yes-terday.

  3. Name: Audio Science
    Shannyn Sossamon - Wow. This sounds like an album. It almost makes me think of the 1980s movie "Weird Science." Great, now the song is stuck in my head.

  4. Name: Moon Unit and Diva Thin Muffin
    Frank Zappa - It wasn't enough that you look weird, now you have two children: one named after an object and the other sounding like some sort of kinky pastry. (I'm sure your kids are wonderful, anyway).

  5. Name: Pilot Inspektor
    Jason Lee - I've got respect for your acting, but really? Du-du-du-du-du Inspector Gadget, Du-du-du-du-du-du-DUUUUUU. This just hurts.

What do you think should make the list? What names have you heard that completely blew your mind? Comment on this blog and don't forget to follow me on Twitter! @J_R_Ortega