Barbara Breazeale

Barbara Breazeale

Going to the grocery store used to be pleasant. At HEB you always saw at least three friends, tested something good at the kiosk and found what you wanted or needed.

Now I find myself grinding my teeth as I select items, or should I say, try to select items that I need. You get used to using Betty Crocker or Pillsbury and now you find a substitute that you never heard of before.

In the pasta aisle, you may find it stocked or looking like a hurricane is coming. I fully expect to see two ladies down on the ground, fighting over egg noodles.

Today I was in the produce area and reached for my usual, five avocados in the green mesh bag. They have always been $4.99 for five avocados but last week they were $6.27 and today $6.75! That is a 36% increase! Is there some kind of an avocado famine going on in Texas or California? And then the crazies come out.

I look up and there is a gentleman standing there and I say, “Each week the groceries go up and up!” He says, “Yes, covid has affected everything!” OMG, they are among us and they drive.

What does Covid have to do with avocados going up? Are they really that delusional? I leave the area quickly mumbling about Brandon.

I have watched people in the meat aisle and, if it was not so pathetic, it would be hilarious. They look, take a second look like their eyes are playing tricks on them, mutter a profanity and move down the aisle hoping that they can find anything that is reasonable. Men are the best, they do the same and then throw it into the basket shaking their head.

A few weeks ago, I went in and needed aluminum foil. I always buy the HEB brand because Reynolds is expensive. I go to reach for the 200 foot roll and proceed to turn into “that woman” right before my eyes. The normal price is $4.58 and now it is $9.50!!!! The roll next to it was $16.58!!!!

By now I am freaking out and my happy pill is doing nothing to help me. I look up and proceed to talk to the next person walking by. “Have you seen this?” and she smiles. I give her a quick lesson in the former price and what we are looking at. Anyone who is within 30 feet of me, hears my wail about that person (I am cleaning this up for all of you) in the White House. People are giving me that look I have given nuts in the past. They smile and try to get by you with their carts. They do not want to engage, they are taking flight.

I go to check out and the poor guy in back of me gets it, too. He is young, kind and does not want this conversation but I persist. Most men do not have a clue about prices especially those 30 or under. He is of that group so I believe it is my place in life to educate him, muttering about Brandon as I go. He nods and smiles because he has nowhere to go.

Finally, I make it up to the checker and proceed to talk to her about the fate of aluminum foil and our country. She does not even know about “Let’s Go Brandon”! Before I crawl over the counter and get her in a headlock, I leave.

I went to California recently to visit my cute granddaughter, daughter and son in law. They are part of the generation that believe they know it all, while dreaming of owning a $1.2 million dollar, 1400 square foot house that needs to be completely torn down and rebuilt. Gas is $5.99 a gallon and when buying food you cannot look at prices or you would starve to death.

Young people would rather do without necessities, see their stock portfolios plummet, make great salaries and give it to the government than hear mean tweets.

I do not do well with smiling while stupidity reigns but I am in a college town surrounded by liberals. I fully expect to see kids playing with a transgender Barbie or a pansexual Panda. I took my grandkids to the local library to get a book and was relieved that the drag queens had slept in that day.

I am trying to do my part to educate. My son gave me those little stickers with Joe Flations’s face on them saying, “I did this” and every time I get gas, the pump gets decorated.

I have a “Let’s Go Brandon” sticker on my car plus a shirt that says it, too. I wear it to HEB hoping that I am face to face with a bipolar young Democrat. Knowing God has a morbid sense of humor, it seems only fitting that I leave this world fighting stupidity.

I am sure my children will put something appropriate on my tombstone like “She was that crazy lady in produce. We are sorry for whatever she said to you.”

I would rather it said, “I told you who to vote for.”

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Barbara Breazeale is a mom to four and grandmother to seven. She is the Advancement Director for Victoria House of Palms, P.O. Box 4886, Victoria Texas 77903. barbarabreazeale@gmail.com.

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Barbara Breazeale writes an occasional blog for the Victoria Advocate.

(4) comments

Patrick Barnes

I shall be sure to watch for you at HEB and avoid you as much as I can.

C Droost

Okay. It’s been a day and I still want to comment (yay! that we all get to do that here!). So, here goes.

“Crazy lady in aisle 17” isn’t exactly the impression of what kind of a person I see you as, but it will do as a reference from here on.

I’m glad you still had the money to go visit your cute grandchild in California even though groceries have gone up so much that you feel the need to “educate” everyone in HEB about why YOU’ve been led to believe (by, primarily I’d guess, FoxNews) those price increases have happened. I wonder though how the US President caused inflation around the rest of the world. Hhhhmmmm…

But, back to cute grandkids … I wonder what you’ll say to your cute grandkids when they’re older and you try to explain the vulgarity you think it’s okay to spew when referring to the President of the country you so loudly proclaim to love. I expect that you’ll just invent some alternate facts to cover for the true meaning of what you so proudly proclaim on your bumper sticker, on your t-shirt, and, by your own admission, so loudly in the middle of a grocery store. Why, you probably have a sign in your yard saying the same thing … right? I’d guess it’s right next to the US flag. It would figure. But, I digress.

Truth is, I’m not at all interested in hearing anything you, or anyone else like you, have to say about anything. I have to respect someone’s opinion before I’ll consider it. And a crazy lady regurgitating curses, vulgarities, and alternative facts (i.e., lies) on aisle 17 and in the checkout lane is not someone whose opinion I’d ever respect. Especially when the life of that lady’s partner was saved because of the efforts and policies of the very same President she’s decided to bash at every turn.

Glenn Wilson

[beam][thumbup]

Daniel Martin

I had no idea you were a NASCAR fan! You know NASCAR is not conservative. They banned the Confederate battle flag at their races. Also there are several non-white drivers! Brandon got lucky and won 1 race! Most of his finishes are in the 20’s and 30’s. When they tried to use that stupid rant as a sponsor on his car NASCAR told him to take it off. Have you ever used the entire original chant? If you insist on using it do it correctly.

Did you go to Bedo’s rally? It was great. BTW….Who is the President of the United States? Did you celebrate January 6th?

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