Advocate editorial board opinion: Cuero turkey could rebound with therapy

By the Advocate Editorial Board
Sept. 22, 2011 at 4:22 a.m.

OK, Ruby. It's time we had a talk.

We know the life of a professional athlete can be tough, what with those fans fawning all over you, the packed publicity schedule and the constant pressure to be in peak condition.

So maybe it's understandable that you needed to take a break while in Worthington, Minn.

But right in the middle of the race? Really, Ruby? Really?

I realize you must pity Paycheck's fans. They are, after all, living in Minnesota. But there's a time to put pity aside, kick some tail and apologize after!

It's been two years since Cuero has seen victory and been crowned the Turkey Capital of the World. Not to mention the "Traveling Turkey Trophy of Tumultuous Triumph." And unfortunately, unless Paycheck decides to explore the alleys of Cuero, as one of your less successful predecessors did, it looks like this year may be another disappointment.

But maybe we're being too harsh. After all, Minnesota is a much colder place than the balmy heat of Cuero. And it must be hard to be surrounded by supporters of the enemy. Maybe you were just perusing the crowd for a friendly face. It can be intimidating when surrounded by such hostility.

And we do know you're trying. Your trainer, Cory Thamm, called and told us he's brought in a sports psychologist to help you deal with the backlash of defeat.

But you should know it's OK, Ruby. Paycheck's just another turkey. YOU are Ruby Begonia! YOU are a Cuero Gobbler from the great state of Texas!

So what if Paycheck has a four-minute lead on you? So what if all of Worthington is rooting against you? So what if that one kid has a really yummy-looking basket of fries?

You are Cuero's racing turkey, Ruby Begonia. We've been waiting with bated breath every year for your inevitable triumph. And once again, you've left us waiting.

So here we are again, Ruby. It's time for one of two things to happen: Either a Disney movie level of a miracle is coming, or we'll be left dejected and defeated in the cloud of Paycheck's dust, clutching the "Circulating Consolation Cup of Consummate Commiseration." We're waiting for you to be our hero, Ruby. Please don't let us down again.

As Thamm said, "It's not over till October."

This editorial reflects the views of the Victoria Advocate's editorial board.



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