End of Days, how to throw your best ark party
By by carolina firstname.lastname@example.org
Dec. 19, 2012 at 6:19 a.m.
It's your chance to throw your swan song of events.
Friday night is supposedly our last night here on Earth, so why not go out with a bang?
While Christmas parties come and go each year, take advantage of the fact that it's not every year, decade or century for that matter - that some ancient civilization has calculated the end of days.
While this past week has brought a considerable amount of glum to households nationwide, let's try to bring back some cheer to the world before we all become dust in the wind.
You may never get this chance again.
Queue: Ne-Yo and Pitbull singing, "Give Me Everything/Tonight."
And in the event the world doesn't end, at least you'll have mastered throwing a Class-A - 'A' for apocalypse - party.
Let's start with a theme.
You could split a decent two-story with a basement into three basic levels: heaven, purgatory and hell.
But let's not take any of these labels too literal.
You're not trying to recreate a scene from the television show "Dexter."
While the Dante's Inferno, three-layered party theme is an alluring challenge, The Ark may suit your mood better.
Turn the classic story of Noah's ark on its head and make it a creative, fun night for all.
Step one: Get a boat, or find somebody with a yacht. That's easy, right? If you can't procure a sturdy sea-friendly vehicle, nix that idea and settle for your home.
I don't think there's any way of getting out of this one - if the Mayans are right, I'm sure we'll be getting more than just a little bit of rain.
Should it be couples only? At least make bringing a friend an option.
Also, animal costumes might be fun.
Send out a Google document so that people can make their pics, so your ark doesn't get any doubles.
You could even go as far as making it a sleepover.
The world is ending anyway right? Why not end it all in an ark.
Pack your bags, wear your most prized possessions and bring a toothbrush.
Party like you have planned any oncoming disaster.
Except, you know, leave your guns at home - this is all in good fun.
If you really think the world is ending - in all seriousness - go home and be with your family.
A canned, ready-made food theme might be fun. A big pot of baked beans with bacon bits sounds delicious, but be sure to watch your toilet paper roll supply as the evening persists.
Make sure there is plenty to drink and eat for at least a week.
We don't want the monkeys to start eating each other alive.
And don't forget the best part of all, dance like no one is watching and party like there is no tomorrow.
Because the Mayans said so, right?