Life At Its Best: Living in harmony

By Jim Graff
July 13, 2012 at 2:13 a.m.

Jim Graff

Jim Graff

I once heard someone say, "All marriages are happy. It's the living together afterward that causes trouble." As funny as that is, it holds some truth. We all go into marriage thinking we're the only perfect couple in the world, confident that our love will last forever.

But after a while, the honeymoon phase ends, and reality sets in. Before we know it, we're having our first fight and wondering if this thing called "marriage" is really going to work.

The truth is that having a good marriage takes effort. Sure, we'll have days when we argue and get frustrated, but we can't allow our hearts to harden toward our spouse. Instead, we must choose to walk in harmony.

Seneca, a Roman philosopher, once said, "It's not because things are difficult that we do not dare, but it's because we do not dare that things become difficult." Everyone encounters difficulties in their marriage.

However, it's when we dare to have a fulfilling marriage in spite of those difficulties that we experience a relationship of harmony.

God's word shows us the pathway to having that kind of marriage. The first step is to keep the passion. In Genesis 2:24 God says, "For this reason a man will leave his father and his mother and be united to his wife and they will become one flesh."

Our spouse is the only person who God has called us to become completely one with, and it's vital that we keep the passion alive. So spend time together. Plan dates. Tell them you love them. Show them, through your words and actions, that you're passionate about them and about living in unity together.

The second step is to pursue peace. Genesis 2:18 says, "The Lord God said, 'It is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.'" The word "helper" refers to someone who is boldly our opposite.

Sometimes it's our differences that lead to arguments in our marriage. But in times like these, we must remember that living in peace doesn't require us to process life the same way.

We don't have to think alike; we just need to think together. God has given each of us different personalities and thought processes so that, together, we can create an amazing environment.

The last step to living in harmony is having patience. In 1 Corinthians 13, the Bible tells us that part of true love is learning to be patient. No one is perfect, and we can't allow our spouse's imperfections to become a cause for disunity. Instead, we must continue to support and encourage each other as we learn and grow together.

So ask yourself today: Are you living in harmony with your spouse? If not, I urge you to follow God's model for marriage. Be passionate and pursue peace with each other. Then, be patient with one another as you continue to grow.

Soon, you'll begin experiencing the incredible marriage relationship God has planned for you.

Jim Graff is the Senior Pastor of Faith Family Church in Victoria.



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